I realized this morning that it has been a week since I last wrote in my blog. This is usually indicative of my being out of town (I wish) or of the fact that I have not really had much to write about.
Not that nothing has happened. Life has continued its daily routine, but I am finding little that will inspire me to write. I also realize I can attribute this to a few things – one, I cannot talk about everything that happens to me because I would not want to misrepresent specific people or situations – I would not want someone reading this to think that is how it always is or this is how all people are. Or, though some people do not believe it, I do not bare my entire soul and everything I feel in this blog. I am honest, but I never say everything.
Two, it is telling of where I am, mood-wise, if I have a hard time finding anything that will inspire me to write.
This morning, in my waking up but not awake period, I was thinking of things that I could write about, and the one idea I came up with was, shall I say, less than enthralling. In fact, it was so mundane that I cannot even remember what it was. Maybe it was my stage of awareness – I am not one of those people who can wake up and write down a great idea and then go right back to sleep. Unfortunately, I tend to lose such ideas that come to me in my restful stage.
In the past week I have tried to get back on the language study wagon. Coming back to the books now is different because I have a better understanding of some things. My main thing at this point is practice, since NO ONE speaks to me in Russian on a regular basis – they all want to speak English. This does not help me develop MY skills. At the same time I have the part of me asking “What’s the use? Will you REALLY use this language again?” and honestly, I don’t know how to answer that. So I still go back and forth, but am trying to push myself to study instead of watching the tv shows I downloaded while at a friend’s place.
I also am dreaming of taking one last, warm vacation this winter, but that is a pipe dream and I know it. I would love to take advantage of my proximity to so many places and go to one of them, but in reality, I don’t want to go alone and cannot really afford it – it is time to start thinking about what will happen when I return to the U.S.
I continued my guest lecture series, with a significantly smaller audience this week – I hope the Stock Market lecture did not scare them all away. I promised one more interesting and delivered – Marketing. Next time is Customer Service, which is close to many expat Americans’ hearts.
And that is just about it. Winter is on its way – luckily for us, we got a reprieve from the cold snap that hit us in October. I am shocked that there are still leaves on the trees, though most of them have changed color.
Strange to think that in seven months I will likely return to the U.S., and in a year, who knows where I will be? I am okay with uncertainty and the future, most of the time. It is getting through the day to day that is tough.